This was a pic from a photo shoot for Dynamic Asia Hats. When I wasn't shooting, I was having my own sand party. Keep you posted on more pics!
Dear Diary,
This is my offering to you this week......
* I'd like to give Thank You SHOUT OUTS to my new readers, followers, and subscribers in the last week! Thank you, Vicky Park, Ji Han, Adam William Ward, @SouthernGallery, Hironori Kotoku, @fancorinnemec, @Boardwalk_Style, @ShaneWarrenJ, @scottmods, and @voicejoy! Thank you so much.
Now on to the main attraction.....
Resistance has been sucking the life out of me. Literally.
I was in Brooklyn visiting fam last week and since I've been back....don't want to do shit. I'm a total creature of habit. I've been trying to figure out why why why. "Why am I feeling drained? Why do I feel so overwhelmed? Why do I feel direction-less? Why am I feeling lazy? I feel like a bum. Why can't I snap out of it? What the fuck's wrong with me?"
Nothing's wrong with me!
And the more I try to figure out WHY.....the more depleted I feel. Because I believe there's something wrong with me.
This post for example.....it's been 2 or 3 weeks since my last post. I've been beating myself up for getting lazy. I can be a bit Nazi-like when it comes to work ethic so every week that went by without my writing a post, I went insane in the membrane.
And I know why. It's because I'm not taking action. I'm just thinking about doing it. Ain't that a bitch? Resisting, fighting, going upstream, all these just take more energy out of you.
So, here's my surrender. I'm taking action. I'm sitting my ass down and writing this now. I'm not waiting for a good topic to inspire me before I start writing. I'm not waiting to feel better first either. This may be counterintuitive for some but, take action first, AND THEN see how you feel.
Alex, there is no perfect topic, the perfect moment, the perfect situation, the perfect weight, the perfect skin, the perfect person, the perfect job, the perfect family, the perfect car, the perfect outfit, etc....so, stop waiting. Forgive yourself about being lazy or not productive.....you needed some downtime and what's done is done. It's but a memory unless you carry it with you day to day. Let it go and finish this damn post.
This post is now finished. Fuck yeah. I battled it out with my Resistance today, and I won. The battle's been won but, the war is far from over. Breathe and know, it's one day at a time.
Now, on to the next.
What action(s) can you take right now? Wishing you an action-packed week.
with MAAAAD LOVE,
x Alex
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