Dear Diary,
Here's my offering to you this week.....
These days before New Year's are a great time to relax and let the right side of your brain take precedence. Let yourself play, relax, do things you want to do but often think you don't have time to do. This "playtime" doesn't just exist for our enjoyment; it's there for balance and creativity. Its function is to break us through to new bursts of life, without which we're likely to go into 2013 simply repeating the patterns of 2012.
- Marianne Williamson
Just wanted to get one last post in before 2012 comes to its completion. I struggled with deciding on the perfect topic to write, "I gotta go out with a bang", but that only made me procrastinate. Waiting for the perfect ________, only makes you wait more. Just freaking write something already, Alex.
I've been laying low since I've been back from NY. Possibly, the case of the holiday blues. Possibly, I'm quietly gearing up for the New Year. Regardless, I'm ready for 2013. Bring it.
I have two goals for 2013. Stand-up and tv shows.
Stand-up just wants to get out of me. I get bombarded with fantasies about doing ass-kickin shows. Even with trying out some cool marketing ideas for the shows. It makes the cells in my body come alive. Who I am comes alive. The audience comes alive. I feel like I already know how it's going to feel. I feel like I have experienced it already. Maybe I did stand-up in a past life. And of course, I will look fabulous and I will be wicked funny. ;)
So, back to class I go. Class starts up again this weekend. I'm excited. I'm writing new stuff, tweaking stuff I have already....it feels good to get the juices flowing again. But, to be honest, I'm so f*cking scared. As much as I know I'm gonna love it, it scares the sh*t out of me. And the thing is, I know it's gonna happen. It's inevitable. And it will haunt me until I do. I just gotta surrender to it.
Then I want some more television credits. I've been unexpectedly getting residual checks for Criminal Minds. I love the feeling of just getting checks in the mail. More please!
The more I visualize these things, the clearer the path gets. I don't ever worry about 'what to do' or 'where to start'....I always hear the right thing at the right time, see the right thing at the right time, and meet the right people at the right time. It's just a matter of getting off my ass and moving. Beginning somewhere.
So based on my desires NOW, I am mapping out what my next 3, 6, 9 months will look like. This is what's in my control. This is my part in co-creating my world. And I'm also staying open and flexible to LIFE. Because with life, there's change. And it will always be the best thing for me, no matter how I feel about it in the moment. This was a big 2012 lesson for me......Acceptance of WHAT IS, Acceptance of the NOW.
I'm looking forward to a New Year, a new world. I didn't think 12/21/2012 was dooms day but, I did and still believe that it was the death of something and the birth of something else. Or a shift. A shift in consciousness. But then again, this can happen every day, at any moment, too. Whatever it was, I'm grateful for it. I'm grateful to have been alive for it. I'm grateful to still be alive after it. So, now what? I'm still here, the world's still here. It's time to create and keep it moving.
So, in 2013.........Let's Move.
Thank you 2012. You were good to me. :)
How are you completing 2012? How do you see 2013 for you?
Happy Holidays and Happy New Year to you. I'll see you in the New Year!
with LOVE,
Alex
