Photo by Sallie DeEtte Mackie
Dear Diary,
Here's my offering to you this week.......
* Yay! Getting back to doing casting director workshops again! I haven't been going out much theatrically and it's been bugging me. I know I can book more television shows, dang it. I used to do all my workshops over at Act Now but, trying out a new place. My first one will be at The Actor's Link this Wednesday with Manny Fernandez, casting associate with Mary Jo Slater. Let's do this.
* Getting ready to do another spoken word show! Yeeeeah. Now that the first show is out of the way, I will keep you all posted on future shows. Come and watch me throw it dowwwwwn. :)
* Last week I mentioned this new face mask I will be experimenting with for a month or two. The product is called Nerium AD. Here are some pics for the 'Before' look. I'll post my bare face pics, weekly, to see how it's working for me. Oh God...my no make-up face....for a girl who's had insecurities around this.....I got balls.
Week 1
The lighting's actually decent in my bathroom so you can't see everything but, I have acne scars and acne. It's gotten better since I've been drinking warm, lemon water every morning (to balance my PH level) and getting regular facials. I use good products for my face, lots of skin/pigment brightening serums. Right now, I'm loving this hydrating serum from Caudalie, and Origins brightening serum. SERUM all the way if you have oily, acne prone skin. Also, I take my vitamins and Omega 3, 6, 9 with Evening Primrose Oil. EPO is great for balancing your hormones. Ladies, this is so good for us. Google it. You'll see a difference in a matter of days.
* More pics peeps! My NEW HEAD SHOTS with Sallie DeEtte Mackie!! What do you think? Click here for the post where I wrote about her and my shoot.
I LOVE them. Very different from your average head shots. They're all so different and yet they're all me. Getting specific and kicking it up a notch. :)
Thank you Sallie and the team for the awesome photos.
Now on to the main attraction.....
“Always be a first rate version of yourself and not a second rate version of someone else.”
― Judy Garland
“Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.”
― Oscar Wilde
“A girl should be two things: who and what she wants.”
― Coco Chanel
I'm finding my voice, my style, as a writer and performer.
Suzanne, my coach told me that she can pick up a piece of writing, read it, and know if I wrote it now.
Do you know how cool that is for an artist?? To have your own style? Aahhhh shiet.
Why is this important to me?
I remember my first acting coach, Cameron Thor said that it's important to have your own style. That's what makes you a star. Because when you have your own style, you no longer become just 'one of them' in a town full of that. You become your own, distinct, unique product. People will come to you for what you can offer.
That was my first branding lesson.
As an Asian American actress, I'm compared to other Asian American actresses. Whether I like it or not, it happens. Am I gonna sit around and cry that I'm not a good enough martial artist? Hell no. Am I gonna sit around and cry that I'm not good with Asian accents? Uh, hell no. Am I gonna sit around and cry that I'm not Lucy Liu, Kelly Hu (I met her in Larry Moss's class..she's actually awesome), Maggie Q, Moon Bloodgood, Sandra Oh, Jamie Chung, blah blah blah? Hell to the freaking no!
That's what the industry does. All it can do is mold you into what already exists, until YOU can show them otherwise. You can't get mad that there aren't awesome roles out there for you...until YOU write them for yourself. That's it. Waiting around for the perfect role.....not gonna happen.
Honestly, who is ever going to write something about a hot, funny, cute, quirky, smart, sassy, ballsy, dry, elegant, potty-mouthed, Korean-American yogi girl with a Brooklyn accent? Nobody. Unless that person is me. You know what I mean? That's why I'm doing spoken word. That's why I'm going to do stand-up. Yeah, I'll audition for roles but, what do I really want? It's to create what I want and say what I want.
My voice, my style, and who I am is good. It's great. I'm good enough. I'm more than enough. I have something to say. I have something to show. I'm special. I'm unique. And until I believe all this about myself first, I can't expect anyone else to.
This is a huge lesson for me as an artist. Especially as a full-fledged blogger now, I used to drive myself crazy because I wanted to write for the readers...write to get more readers....write to appeal to more. I became a slave to what I thought people would want. And it drove me nuts. I would get frustrated and stressed because I didn't know what the hell to write about....and when I finally wrote something that I thought, "People are gonna love this sh*t" and it didn't get the response I was expecting...I would resent them. Yup. Being a people pleaser is a disease. And as artists, we can't afford to get sick like that. Our job is to stay authentic and honest...to ourselves first. The rest will follow.
Now, I write about what I want to write about. I write about what I'm going through. I write to please me. I write to heal me. I write to inspire me. My life coach, Justina asked me, "What do you want?" "I want to inspire people", I said. You know what she said? "To inspire, you have to be inspired." It always starts with you. Again, be authentic and honest with yourself first....because the rest WILL follow. Why? Because we're all the same. People connect with real sh*t. Just be real.
I've become a damn good writer now. I'm a damn good storyteller. I'm a damn good actress. I'm a damn good human being. I'm a damn good Soul. Cause, I got my own style.
So, you wanna know how to find your own voice, your own style? Whatever it is you're doing...whether it's acting, writing, singing, dancing, etc......JUST KEEP DOING IT. That's it. You can't find it overnight...it takes time and nurturing. Keep doing it. Go to your craft, your art when you're happy, go to it when you're sad, go to it when you're angry, go to it when you're in love, go to it when you're heartbroken, go to it when you can't sleep, go to it with friends, go to it and go to it and go to it, with all your heart...that's where YOU are. And THAT's your voice, THAT's your style.
Have a great week my fellow special peeps. Have a great f*cking week. :)
with LOVE,
Alex
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