'Taking Care Of Sandy Business' Guest-Star, Here I Come! Week 46-48

Dear Diary,

Here's my offering to you this week....


Holy crap.  I can't believe it's been three weeks since my last entry.  My right hand was out of commission for a week because my sister's dog bit me.  You know, the cute little Shih Tzu that was in my first Hurricane Sandy vlog.  Yes, that cute little terror bit my hand so hard that you were able to see my bone.  I had to get a tetanus shot and was on antibiotics for 10 days.

I'm still here in New York....I extended my stay for another two weeks because we're in the thick of things here now.....like dealing with insurance and FEMA (Federal Emergency Management Agency).  Lordy lordy lordy.

Insurance doesn't want to pay up so they're categorizing Sandy as an 'unprecedented meteorological event'...meaning, no one's covered by being in this 'grey' area.  "Oops, sorry everyone".  We hired a public adjuster now to handle matters with insurance.  We're going to have to fight now.

Then there's FEMA.  You first file with them, then they send you over to SBA (Small Business Administration) to see if you're qualified for a low-rate loan, and if you're not, then you're sent back to FEMA to see if you can get a grant.

It's been challenging and annoying.  There are so many steps and sub-steps.  When you think you've crossed over a milestone, you've actually taken a step back.  The government employees are kind but, due to so much miscommunications, you want to punch them in the face.  You want to yank yer hair out and punch them in the face.  Mercury's not in retrograde anymore....WTF.  'The process' is what can make a person go cuckoo.

Good news is, there's a small non-profit group that is working to get businesses and residents back to normal as fast as possible, in Rockaway.  They are called Rockaway Relief.  Please check out their site.  I'll be helping them out  while I'm here.

To be honest, at times I feel like I'm missing out on things in LA.  I feel like I'm missing out on casting director workshops, I feel like I'm not writing as much, I feel like I'm not going to get to my stand-up and more spoken word shows, I feel like I'm not doing much for my career right now and it fills me up with anxiety.

When I tell people I'm staying longer, they say, "Oh, you're doing such a good thing for your family".....yes, but, I don't do it with a smile on my face 24/7.  I get into my moods.  I find other reasons to explode at my family...any reason I can.  This is my Ego.  My Ego tells me, "I'm not taking care of MY sh*t because I'm helping YOU."  Instead of feeling guilty for thinking and feeling this way, I'm acknowledging it.  Of course, as soon as you shed some light on it, it no longer has a hold on you.  It's also funny.  I'm remembering that this is where I need to be.  I'm remembering to see lessons and opportunities all around me.  This is where I'm meant to be because this is where I am right now.  I'm just gonna stay present and do my best to help while I'm here.  The power and ability to create is wherever I am.  Doesn't matter where I am geologically.  I ain't missing out on sh*t!

For sh*ts and giggles
Wanna see a picture of something I yelled at my grandma for because I was having one of my Ego episodes?  We were expecting insurance adjusters to show up to around the clock and this is what my KOREAN grandmother had on our front porch.  I was mortified and angry.  Totally reminded me of days when she would cook so much that my clothes would stink for school.  I also didn't like inviting friends over because the house would smell like pungent Korean food.  I'm in junior high again.  :D

Yes, that's her drying cabbage and fish.  OMG.

I hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving.  I hope you have a great week.



with LOVE,

Alex